The CHERRY on TOP of my SWEET life.

“Follow your heart, wherever it may lead you.”

“There’s a reason why your head is placed about your chest. The mind should be more dominant than your heart.”

Even before terrorism in the world began, there’s always this unending battle between two forces that seem to last for almost hundreds and thousands of years already: The battle between the mind and the heart.

Nobody could even tell when and how did this issue seem to sprout, and yet this is one of the most talked about predicaments in our lives today. The brain and the heart was already studied and even science says that both organs are essential to one person’s existence.

Actually, no one could live without the other.

And yet, they can not be together either.

Now the question remains the same: Which matters more? What your mind speaks, or what your heart feels?

Born in a simple home with high hopes and big dreams, I always believed that love exists. Why the hell am I even here if there is no love? Love is always there: It surrounds us. It nourishes us and sometimes, it consumes us. Yet I am not that fully aware yet of what the feeling brings until I first felt it.

From having simple crushes to the “mutual understanding” stage to courtship then having a stable relationship, I can say that I’ve experienced love both at its best and worst.

I have heard so many things about love, and I’ve seen relationships succeed and fail too. If there’s one thing that I promised myself its that I will never let my heart roll down the hill: In short, My head will always be dominant above else.

But as we know, we often neglect to do what we say. I let my heart fall head over heels, and unfortunately, I haven’t got that happy ending that I’ve dreamed of. Right then and there, I turned my back on everything positive about loving; I let my head rule over my life, even my emotions. Those happy endings before turned sour; happy memories turned bitter. After everything that had happened, my mind speaks for me, with no exceptions.

I valued myself and my opinion about love so much, that I did not even believe in destiny or fate. I believe in making decisions and choices. What the hell does destiny do? It is just an excuse to not make things happen. If you want something to happen, you find ways to do it. there’s no such thing as the ”right time”. How can you even tell that something is right or wrong unless it is dictated by the society itself, like, say, our codes of conduct or the laws of your nation. The same thing with my case, I created my own rules within to dictate whether a thing, a person, or a decision is right for me or not.

Being objective is like my own way of breathing. It keeps me moving; it keeps me alive.

Seeing my life today, I can say that I am contented with what I have: I have a stable career, a newly-established business of my own, a family whom I love the most and a thriving relationship for 2 years.

Yet, being contented is so far from being happy.

Having my life ruled by my head has its its own boons and, of course, banes. I have sacrificed so much to put my life in order: to get everything done, and to put my life on track. What track, you ask? It is the track of myself against everything else that I thought that matters: career, family life, social status, and even time itself. All of my life I have been in a constant battle against my own standards, and I have to beat them before everything crashes down in front of me.

Well, that was what I thought.

As I’ve grown and matured more I realized that the brain is not always right. Yes, it is good that you are governed by your own self, thus less mistakes are done. But to truly appreciate life, you have to take risks. You have to jump off the cliff and let the winds catch you… and no matter what happens, you will always remember not the place where you landed, but the feeling of flying.

A wise person told me that the quality of your life is not always about the length of it, for it’s in its depth you find true meaning. Being governed by the mind will make you achieve more in life, but cannot bring you true happiness. Yes, money, fame and power can make you buy things and let you be with the persons that will make you happy, but cannot bring you genuine happiness per se. Now, re-evaluating my life once more, I realized that there are some things in my life that I considered important then that are irrelevant now. And I am thankful that my heart taught me how to value happiness in its true form: with no pretentions. Just plain bliss, and now I’m home.

If there is a work-life balance in our professional lives, then I believe that there must be a heart and head balance also when it comes to the personal aspects. I am still thankful that I let my mind take over ever since; If not for it, then I am not the ‘Rea’ that I am right now. I can’t even imagine where would I be if it weren’t for my head. And Yet I haven’t fully lived my life yet, because I carry a big baggage with me called “regrets”. And as I go on living a life full of objectivity and cynicism, that baggage gets heavier and heavier, and the heaviness will never stop until you realize that it is now time for you to be happy - for your heart to take over. It will be awkward at first, for you will certainly feel like you’re back at square one. But I tell you, It is not that bad after all.

Actually, EVERYTHING’S JUST WAY BETTER THAN BEFORE.    

And you will never experience this feeling until you jump… ‘Cause no matter how I describe the feeling of being happy and in love with life itself once more, you will never appreciate it until it is your turn.

:) Let your head and heart work together: You can be in control with your life while being in love with it. You have to love everything about it. Nothing should challenge you more than the uncertainties that it brings. You just have to live everyday as if it is your last.  

You just have to love life, and it will love you right back, way more than you thought it would.   

Thank you for making me believe in love again.   

This is one of the most sincere expression of feelings I have ever read.

*sob* *tears*

“I’ll be loving you always…”

A dream. A beautiful dream. The kind of dream that will make you never want to wake up ever. It is filled with infinite happiness and love. I never felt that kind of happiness before; it was something way beyond words could ever explain. A feeling that comes from the deepest part of your heart. Only the universe could explain such a feeling. My soul departed from my body and traveled into a place where loneliness and sadness does not exist. An angel brought me to that place. And in that place, all the wonderful things happened. She would look into my eyes and that would mean so many things that even a million words could not match. She would hold my hand I would feel like I’m holding the world. She would speak to me with such sincerity that even the doubtful would believe. She would kiss my lips and then I would feel like time and space does not exist. I would look into her beautiful brown eyes and I would see my whole life. It was beyond happy stories and fairy tales. It was something real. Something real that existed in a dream.

Then you wake up. You gasp for air. Panic sinks in. Everything is gone. You’re awake now. You’d feel the worst kind of loneliness and sadness. You would feel like everything has been taken away from you. The sad part is, it was perfect. The dream was perfect. It was everything I wanted and more. It is so hard to let go of something like that. And now it’s gone. You’d ask the heavens a million questions and you would get no answer. Not even one. You can’t understand anything anymore. You can’t do anything even if you wanted to. You have no power. You have no control. You can’t get the dream back anymore. You’re helpless. There’s no meaning in things anymore. Nothing.

A bright and sunny day seemed like a rainy night. The clear sky seemed to be a large empty space of nothingness. The stars are far now. You can’t reach it anymore. It’s impossible. Time and space seemed to move slow now. The world would pass you by and you’re in the front row seat, just watching as everything crashes down. You try to hold on to anything, but there’s nothing. You fall into a deep pit and slowly everything just fades into black.

My life would never be the same. I would never be the same. It was a taste of perfection. That dream changed everything. All of it, it felt like home. There wouldn’t be a day that I won’t be missing her. I still believe in the stars. I still believe that sometimes, dreams do come true. I still believe in love. I still believe in us.

I’m still hoping that we would see each other again. I know deep within myself that I would be waiting for that moment when would be together again and we would never ever part. And when that time comes, I can finally say that I am home.

If not in this life, definitely in another lifetime, you and me. Forever.